Future Fears

Conference weekend is always a mix of high and lows.  Highs because I am able to listen to wonderful talks by leaders and stay home all weekend in my pajamas.  Lows because I stay home all weekend in my pajamas, and sometimes I find it hard to connect to all talks.  I tend to find that some jump out at me as I listen and help me find answers to questions I didn't realize I was searching for.  One of these talks was by Elder Neil L. Anderson. 

Lately I have been "dr. philing" every situation in regards to the baby.  Every-night I go to bed with my head filled with questions as to how to Jake and I are going to make it alone without the thought of adding on another person.  What I love about Elder Anderson's talk is that it reminded me of the sweet comforting spirit that assured both Jake and I that this is what we are supposed to be doing.

I decided that for my benefit it was time to write down how we came to the decision to have a baby, (because pregranancy brain is a real thing and I often forget why we got into this situaiton)

It really started last December the day after finals.  I was finishing up my first semester actually teaching and I was dead set on having my own class the following year through an internship.  I wanted nothing more than being able to teach and connect with my own classroom of little children.  I knew that this was my calling in life to teach.  Although while I was making my own plans of classroom themes and dreaming about all the fun activities I would do with my own classroom, I was unaware of the path that was set out for Jake and I.  After being promised full time hours at work for about a year Jake was told that he would not be able to have full time or go to school and that his hours were in fact getting cut.  We spent a good two days not knowing where we were going to go from there.  After talking to both our families and praying about what to do Jake decided to quit his job and go to school full time.  This allowed him to finish in a year as opposed to 3.  So we talked it over, looked at our savings and decided that this was best.  Plus this fit into my whole idea of having an internship because we would both finish at the same time.

While Jake decided to finish off work and put in his 2 weeks notice I went to the temple.  I hadn't even made it to the start before I was overwhelmed with the feeling that there was a little baby waiting and that Jake and I needed to start a family.  Contrary to my normal personality I accepted the sweet feeling of peace I had.  When I got home I told Jake, who as anyone can imagine was not very happy and replied "Well I didn't get that feeling so I guess your wrong." To be honest I couldn't blame him.  Our world was already overturned by our job and school without trying to add the cost of having a child.  But I couldn't deny that sweet feeling of peace so I just responded "Well go to the temple yourself and you'll know."  Unfortunately for Jake I was right lol.  So all through Christmas break we looked and looked at finances and tried to figure out how it was going to work.  We looked and realized that we had exactly the right amount of money left over in my savings for me to finish school and cover the hospital costs. No joke, there is literally not $10.00 left over.  As if our previous experience wasn't enough to convince us to trust in the Lord he was showing us yet again what our path was.  So we figured out when and how it would work and left the rest in the Lord's hand taking the biggest leap of faith I have ever made in my life.

Even with all of the amazing signs showing me this was the way I was still skeptical that it would work out.  I was a doubting Thomas all the way.  Well like Thomas I was converted and we found out we were expecting.  I knew that I would be finished with school Dec. 9th; so it was a complete shock when we found our due date moved to Dec. 16th.  Jake and I were fortunate enough to both have the opportunity to work in Hemet this summer allowing us to pay for the baby past the hospital.  For Jake and I this was our biggest fear, we did not want to rely on our parents to help take care of our child.  We felt it was extremely important that we pay for our child.  With that being said I don't know what we would do without the generosity of both our parents.  Their kind support, excitement and willingness to help.  I wish everyone could have the amazing support group that I am blessed to have.  I know I would be lost without my family and my in-laws, that includes my sister-in-laws.  Being the oldest I don't have an older sibling to ask my questions and what worked and what didn't and I am grateful that my sister-in-laws are always willing to answer my dumb questions without making me feel dumb.  It would be a hard process without my family and my in-laws and their utter joy and excitement.  There is no better feeling that having people as excited as I am for this little boy to get here.  I am truly grateful for this opportunity to be a mom soon.  I know that this is the path I am supposed to be on and that we are supposed to have a sweet baby boy in Dec.  I think I needed to hear Elder Anderson's talk and to be reminded of that overwhelming peace I felt back in Dec, and the countless signs showing me that the Lord is looking out for me.

I know this is a rather long post but I decided that it was definitely time to show my appreciation and to take the hint to trust in him and follow the path as best I can.           

Pregnancy Lows

Although I'm on my lunch break I thought I should share my new pregnancy low. For some reason my morning sickness has decided to come back so I decided to grab a diet coke from the gas station because that usually helps. Well after getting my 44 oz liquid gold I saw powered doughnuts. I ended up literally buying 2 bags because I could not put them down. If you have ever been prego before you understand the literal dying need for a food craving. So I proceeded to pay go my soda and doughnuts. Well I thought about driving away but the doughnuts were calling to me so I stayed in the parking lot and ate both bags. While I count this as a low my high consists of being able to wall away from 2 bottles of red Gatorade because I figured a 44 oz was more then enough to get me trough the next 3 hours. Hope this low puts a smile on your face as you picture a crazy pregnant lady stuffing her face with white powered doughnuts.
I took pictures to show that I am in fact telling the truth but I'll add them when I'm home.

Bedding!

So excited his little bedding came today!! We were very blessed to have Jake's parents buy us a crib and dresser and my parents to buy all his bedding.  It was so fun to pick it out and finally get it all put up! I still have to clean the room before I can set it all up lol. Can't wait till he's here and laying in it!!!!

Can't wait till he's old enough to put the bumper on

Inherited Traits

So lately I've been teaching my cute little 5th graders about inherited traits and genes and all that good science stuff and it has made me think of some funny things about this little baby boy that is coming soon and if he'll be more like Jake or unfortunately like me.

Things We Already Know

• He has my nose: We were able to get a couple of 3d shots during my 22 week ultrasound and it is very clear that he has my nose. Which will probably be really cute on him, but man do I feel a little bad for him growing up I didn't like mine. 
• He will be a BIG baby: This entire pregnancy I have been blaming Jake for out little boy measuring WAY ahead of schedule and big until last week when I was talking to my mom.  We all laugh at how Jake was honestly 10.5!!!! That's a big baby! Well then my mom was talking about how I was 8.3 (large for a girl) but oh don't forget I was 2 weeks early! Ya I realized that if I would have come when I was supposed to I would have been a lot heavier...so basically our little baby is crap out of luck. But having a big baby is ok, Jake and I only have now told people to only buy 3 months clothes as the smallest lol. Plus babies are cute with a little fat on them so no biggie. 
• He likes his own personal space: Last week I was at my dr appointment and the nurse placed the heart monitor on my stomach to make sure that all is going well, well she could never get a good hearing because he kept kicking/hitting the monitor off my stomach. No joke it was the funniest thing ever. No matter where she moved and pushed he pushed back. After a good 10 minutes of trying to hear she just laughed and said "well it looks good since he's moving and fighting me." So later that night Jake and I discovered that if you push on my stomach he hits/kicks you to move. Jake has too much fun with this new discovery. It really is something funny because Jake and I both LOVE our own personal space.  We hate it when people stand to close in line or sit to close at place so it only makes sense that our little baby would hate mom and dad creeping in on his own space.  
• He is destined to be a thug: he can only choose to root for the Radiers, Dodgers, and 49ers (which are not supper classy teams if I'm being honest). With the Radiers he will be part of the 10% who root for them and wear their apparel and are white. Trust me, growing up in SoCal with a dad who LOVES the Radiers I know this is a fact. Since we're talking about them, lets talk about how their fans tend to be people who have no fear in beating people up or hassling those who oppose them. But its all good because deep down everyone knows that Radier fans are totally bad a. Which is why my dad picked out and bought on his own a little Radier jersey for him.  Next to the Dodgers.  Lets just recall the fact that 2 dodger fans put a giants fan in a coma at the start of the season. I think that should pretty much sum it all up about who the dodger fans are and what kind of people they are. Like I said though theres about 10-20% of the fan population who are completely normal, law abiding citizens.  Next to the 49erns. Jake is a HUGE fan and grew up loving them so he has made sure to look for things to buy the baby that are 49er apparel. Well I know this might be hard to believe but at the opening game between the Radiers and the 49ers, two 49er fans shot and killed two Radier fans.  Yup, we are introducing our child to wonderful role models.  Its all good though because I guess it means we're just training him to be a total bad a with a majority of good citizen. Ok lets be honest he wont really be a thug.
• He likes war movies: Jake and I absolutely LOVE a good war movie.  Like Gladiator (we were considering naming him Maximus for a time), or Saving Private Ryan, you know a great war movie with fighting and blood and a great story of heros.  So as I was planning a bunch of lessons for school I decided to turn on Last of the Mohicans (another amazing movie). As soon as the movie started he started moving like crazy. Literally you could see him moving across my stomach. I took a little minute to be so proud that my son likes a good war r movie. He is definitely my son.  

Although I know it will be a while before I realize if he is more like me or Jake, right now its fun to pick up on little things and figure out who he is more like. Its the ultimate competition between Jake and me right now...we'll see who wins 

His 49er Burpcloth

Little Raider jersey from my Dad

Aunt Kenz bought him his first little onezie and I made his blanket

 

Happy 100 Days!!

I have a ton and I mean a TON of different lesson plans and activities to use with students when we reach the 100th day of school so I figured it only right to celebrate 100 days till my due date!!!

Everyday I teach I realize how like a child I am. I always want it to be snack time, I get bored if I sit still for too long, I would rather color than take notes during a lesson, and I absolutely love recess.  Therefore I decided to support my inner child and celebrate this exciting day!  It is so surreal to know that in 100 days I will reach my due date.  But I think the thing that is even more surreal is the knowledge that I will be holding my sweet baby boy in a max of 107 days. Today was the first day I was glad that Jake ended up weighing 10.5 and that our boy is looking like he will be a big one too lol.  Most of time I have blamed Jake and told him that I am going to cut our little baby out myself if he ends up being close to 10.5 pounds, but today I'm glad that my doctor will only let me go a week over my due date.  It is so hard to know that by the time it reaches Dec 23rd we will have a sweet new baby in our arms.  

It is seriously the most exciting thing to be happening this year.  I cannot wait to hold him and have him here.  Knowing he will be here by Christmas is making this summer last forever.  I have never been so excited for Christmas music, Christmas movies, Christmas lights, and last but not least snow.  Its a good thing I have an excuse for being excited for winter or else I would be seriously worried about myself and if I have become too Utah... But for know I will just count down the days until he is here!!!  

Sweet Summer

Since we are back in Utah and school starts Monday I have resigned to the fact that summer is now over. Which is a little bittersweet considering it means I won't be seeing my family very much, and the little tan that I had gotten in California will be gone in about 2 weeks. But it also means that we are that much closer to baby getting here at Christmas so I guess I'm ok that summer is gone.

Jake and I mainly worked everyday (its so fun being an adult) but we did manage to squeeze in a trip to Disneyland with my sisters and a trip to Colorado to stay at my grandparents cabins. I have decided to include pictures and the highlights my last summer before officially growing up and being a parent.

Highlights

• Dividing up into teams and competing on kinect sports.  Honestly watching my dad and sister gabby box was one of the funniest things I've ever seen.
• Brenna kicking my butt at Just Dance for the wii, but I did redeem myself by kicking her butt while playing Dance Central for the kinect.
• Driving down Florida Ave and pointing out all the prostitutes to Jake. Where else can you go where this happens on your way to Target or Inn Out? 
• Not having any Utah drivers. It was such a nice break to have drivers who actually knew how to drive, and proving to Jake that California drivers are better than Utah. 
• While at Disneyland eating every possible junk food that I felt like. Sometimes being pregnant is wonderful, no-one looks twice at you when you're eating.  
• Watching Kenz walk up after riding the rapids ride, she was completely soaking wet while Gabby was totally dry. Honestly it was so funny, I think she spent the rest of the day trying to dry off lol. 
• Making baby things! I was able sew a cute fleece blanket and some burp-clothes for him. I am finishing up some car seat covers so it'll be fun once everything is all done! 

Just being around my family. It was a special time for me and a time that I will always remember and cherish.  

First time my "bump" was visible

He needed a cute little blanket to match the outfit Aunt Kenz bought

 

Colorado

We all looked like this after our ride

 

 Disneyland

Trying to capture how soaking wet Kenz was

 Mhmm cotton candy

Needless to say it was a very fun summer, looking forward to next year and seeing where we are living and what we do with our baby! 

Naughty or Nice?

This year for Christmas Santa will be bringing me....a BABY. ( I don't know if this means I've been naughty or nice) Yup that's right. Jake and I went to see our Dr. on Wed and got our third and final due date. So our new due date is Dec 16, and my Dr. said because he is growing so fast she wouldn't let me go past Dec 23. Meaning that this year on Christmas we will have a little baby! I am actually really excited, it seems a little weird to have an official date but oh well right now we're having fun thinking of Christmas presents.

Now I just have to make it through student teaching without blowing up and becoming a blimp, and Jake needs to make it through finals without me going into labor. So needless to say Dec will be a very exciting month! On a side note I told Jake that if the baby is as big as he way (10.5) I will preform my own c section on myself and will forever blame him for any discomfort I might have during labor.